News / humor
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1 min read
Golden Years
Read more . . . →The retirement plan was a vest. He is 78, he is smiling, and he is the first face you see at the door because the pension was the first thing to leave. The poster behind him sells a beach. His shift ends at six.
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Fast Fashion Carousel
Read more . . . →Ride’s a dollar. Somebody downstairs paid the rest. The carousel spins, the dresses change every week, and the pile underneath keeps growing. One person is stitching the next ride out of the last one. One person has champagne. Guess which one the haul video is about.
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1 min read
Hiring Process
Read more . . . →Two hundred applied. One had the right last name. The conveyor never stops and the furnace never cools. Everyone in the line did the courses, the unpaid internship and the four rounds of interviews, and their résumés go in face down. The one that gets pulled out has the same signet ring as the hand holding it.
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Net Zero
Read more . . . →One plastic tree, forty thousand stumps, and a press release calling it a milestone.
Get the tee →Support the blogSome shirts are statements. This one is a verdict. -
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The News
Read more . . . →You said you wanted to stay informed. This is what you agreed to.
Get the tee →Support the blogMade for people who left the room during Yellow. -
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Gratuity, Vended
Read more . . . →It has no hands, no shift, and no feelings. It would still like 30%.
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Rolling Out the Red Carpet
Read more . . . →You survived. Now the itemised part starts.
Get the tee →Support the blogLooks like Helvetica. Sounds like a closing argument. -
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Per My Last Email
Read more . . . →He followed up. Twice. Then he rested.
Get the tee →Support the blogThree words. One opinion. Cotton. -
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Sponsored Content
Read more . . . →NASCAR at least has the decency to put the logos on the outside.
Get the tee →Support the blogWhat if your laundry was also a personality? -
1 min read
Market Rate
Read more . . . →Five guys, one lever, and whatever number comes out they all agree to call it “the market.”
Get the tee →Support the blogShips in 3–5 days. The outrage ships immediately.
