26 years ago today, Coldplay released “Yellow.” It still sucks.
The whole song rides one metaphor a 15-year-old would’ve crossed out: you’re a star, I went yellow, the end. Chris Martin found four notes on a guitar, decided that was plenty, and pushed the falsetto until “earnest” started doing the job that “good” was supposed to do. Then the ad agencies got hold of it, and for the next decade you couldn’t watch a car drift down a coastal road or a phone spin on a white background without that mopey little riff leaking out of the speakers. It didn’t soundtrack a generation. It sedated one.
The real crime is everything it drowned out. 2000 was a monster year for dance music — French house was at its absolute peak and Warp was untouchable, and the clubs were having a better time than any man whining about his own complexion ever could.
Here’s what you should listen to instead. All 2000. All better: