January
Chrome Daydream
Chrome stars, jelly hearts and holographic colour. A nod to the glossy, optimistic graphics of the early web.
News / tech
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1 min read
Two Letters
Read more . . . →The slide has two letters and the man has tears. The valuation just tripled. Everyone in the room is clapping. The presentation is one slide with one word on it. The man in front is weeping like he watched a miracle, and technically he did: a pitch deck that weighs nothing and costs everything. The cheque clears before the applause stops.
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1 min read
Secondhand Clout
Read more . . . →The resale market hits different when the product was already worthless new. Five bucks gets you the checkmark somebody paid eight for. They’re on velvet like antique watches, and the guy behind the counter isn’t fooling anyone. Every pawn shop tells the same story: someone needed the cash more than the symbol. Verification used to mean something. Now it means you had a credit card and a moment of weakness.
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1 min read
Screen Time
Read more . . . →Someone designed a slot machine cute enough that a kid would carry it to bed. It looks like a toy and it was designed to look like a toy. Spinning reels with stars and hearts, and a coin chute that runs from the nursery floor straight to a man in a suit who has never once met the kid. The app costs nothing. The dopamine schedule is the product, and the product ships to a six-year-old. The mascot on the front is load-bearing. Take it off and you’re looking at a casino with a content rating.
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1 min read
Q3 Results
Read more . . . →Growth was strong this quarter. The chart just needed somewhere to stand. The board is delighted. The numbers go up and to the right, and they are drawn in chalk on the one guy who actually made them. The shareholder letter will not mention him. In this picture he is furniture.
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1 min read
Hiring Process
Read more . . . →Two hundred applied. One had the right last name. The conveyor never stops and the furnace never cools. Everyone in the line did the courses, the unpaid internship and the four rounds of interviews, and their résumés go in face down. The one that gets pulled out has the same signet ring as the hand holding it.
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1 min read
Your Laptop Is a National Security Threat Now
Read more . . . →The Trump administration is considering tariffs on every laptop, gaming console, and server that touches a semiconductor, which is all of them. The pitch is that this will bring chip manufacturing back to American soil. The reality is that a chip fab costs $20 billion, takes five years to build, and employs fewer people than a regional hospital. Your next laptop costs 20% more by Christmas. Intel gets a talking point for its investor call. You get the bill. Howard Lutnick, the Commerce Secretary who used to run a Wall Street brokerage, is the one designing this. His plan ties...
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1 min read
How to Tell a Frontier Model From a Fat Kitten
Read more . . . →Before you reshare the next screenshot of a “frontier model,” run it through the Le Chaton Fat test. Is there a real model card or product page, or just a screenshot of a chart? Can you actually call it — open weights to download, or an API key that works? Is the benchmark published and reproducible, or is the “leaderboard” one image somebody made in an afternoon? Le Chaton Fat failed all three: no weights, no API, no model card, and the only leaderboard it ever topped was a parody chart bragging about a croissant context window and 1,000 meows...
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1 min read
The Fat Kitten That Fooled the Whole Timeline
Read more . . . →In late May, Mistral renamed its chatbot Le Chat — French for “the cat” — to “Vibe.” The fans mourning the cat did what the grieving do online: they built a replacement. Le Chaton Fat. Franglais for “the fat kitten,” an oxymoron with a face. It started in Mistral’s own community, hit X around June 11, and within hours actual machine-learning researchers were asking out loud if it was real. Cody Blakeney posted, dead serious, “Can someone tell me if Le Chaton fat is real or an amazingly elaborate joke?” No weights. No API. No model card. It never hit...
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1 min read
Salesforce Replaced the Engineers. The Salespeople Are Fine.
Read more . . . →Salesforce didn’t hire a single engineer last year. Not one. Marc Benioff — $145 billion company, personal net worth north of $10 billion — stood up and told the world that AI handles the coding now, so why pay humans to do it? Productivity’s up 30%, he said, clearly pleased with himself. Zero new engineers in fiscal year 2026. That’s the headline he volunteered. That’s the thing he thought was worth bragging about. But here’s what he made sure to mention in the same breath: sales is booming. Nearly 20% more salespeople hired. Because someone still needs to walk into...
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1 min read
Record Profits. Fire the Measurers.
Read more . . . →Cloudflare posted record revenue last quarter — $639.8 million, up 34%, best quarter in the company’s 16-year history — then fired 1,100 people. Twenty percent of the company, out. CEO Matthew Prince needed a word for these people, so he invented one: “measurers.” Accountants, auditors, middle managers, legal. The people who make sure the company doesn’t eat itself from the inside. Gone. Prince and his co-founder insisted this wasn’t a cost-cutting exercise. It was the “agentic AI era.” They released a statement so thick with future-speak it barely registers as English. The stock dropped 24% after the announcement — Wall...
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