News / music
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1 min read
X&Y turns 21 and it still sucks
Read more . . . →21 years ago today, Coldplay released X&Y. It still sucks. Thirteen tracks of a band straining to sound enormous and landing on damp. “Speed of Sound” is just “Clocks” with the batteries dying. “Fix You” is a motivational poster you can cry to at both weddings and funerals, depending on the open bar. The whole thing is so airless that Chris Martin spent the next decade telling interviewers it wasn’t very good — and when the guy who made the record is the one running cleanup on it, that’s not humility. That’s a confession. Here’s what you should listen to...
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1 min read
Stadium Pop, Visualized
Read more . . . →Two hundred bucks to watch a beige slab and fall asleep in your seat. Most honest tour poster ever printed.
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1 min read
Viva la Vida turns 18 and it still sucks
Read more . . . →18 years ago today, Coldplay released “Viva la Vida.” It still sucks. The Wikipedia-history crowd absolutely ate this one up. Chris Martin whispered vaguely about kings and castles over a string section he definitely didn’t write, and the entire planet decided it was profound. It’s not. It’s a pub quiz answer dressed as an anthem — three minutes of someone else’s history lesson, and the world called it the song of the year. The Grammys agreed. The Grammys are also frequently wrong. It took Brian Eno to make Coldplay sound this expensive, and they still ended up in court over...
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1 min read
Higher Power Turns Five (The Skip Button Is Still Working)
Read more . . . →5 years ago today, Coldplay released “Higher Power.” The only higher power involved was the skip button. It’s a song about reaching for god, or love, or the cosmos — pick one — but what it actually sounds like is a SoulCycle instructor’s Spotify playlist. Chris Martin squeezed into auto-tune like a man trying to prove he can still fit into his high school jeans. The lyrics are what you’d get if you asked a fortune cookie to write stadium rock and then dipped it in Bono. Here’s what you should listen to instead — what 2021 actually sounded like:...
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1 min read
A Sky Full of Stars turns 12 and it still sucks
Read more . . . →12 years ago today, Coldplay released “A Sky Full of Stars.” It still sucks. They got Avicii to produce it — the guy had just turned “Wake Me Up” into one of the biggest records in years — and somehow ended up with a drop that lands like wet cardboard. Chris Martin going “oh-oh-oh-woh” over a chord progression that sounds like it was assembled from a Dropbox folder called epic_festival_moment_FINAL_v2.wav. Avicii’s ghost is out there right now, staring at the ceiling of whatever afterlife he ended up in, wondering how it went so wrong. Here’s what you should listen to...
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1 min read
Stoned Ape Theory
The Stoned Ape Theory on video. Just a theory. But it's a very good theory. Watch it.Read more . . . →Get the tee →Support the blogIf you wear this and someone hugs you, that's a real friend. -
1 min read
Breakz 5 - A Great, Natural Solution to RSI and Carpal Tunnel
Read more . . . →Hey there everyone, I don't often review software, but I have been using this program to combat RSI for a couple years. As a producer, I am often sitting in front of the computer in the studio for many hours without a break. Some days I work many hours on the computer in a row, and other days my work is quite varied so I need a solution to keep an eye on my ergonomics while I get lost in my workflow. Enter Breakz, my Personal Ergonomic Assistant. Breakz 5 used to be called MacBreakz and it is basically a...
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1 min read
Music Mondays: ATAM004 - Massaad + Garland - Atmosphere
Read more . . . →Here is a track that was made by the Ottawa-based vocal duo Massaad + Garland and just released at the begining of March 2011 on the independent electronic label ATAM Productions I'm a big fan of the vocoder sound so this one is an instant win but also worthy of attention is the instrumental version which doesnt have any of this vocal. A bit of history about the track: the music and percussion was originally made for last summer but for some reason or another it never got finished. This year a vocal was added and the whole thing was...
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Music Mondays: Inverse Phase (8-bit Cee Lo - Fuck You parody)
Inverse Phase's 8-bit cover of Cee Lo's Fuck You is the greatest chiptune brilliance ever heard. That's a bold claim. Listen and report back.Read more . . . →Get the tee →Support the blogWhat if your laundry was also a personality? -
1 min read
Guitar Hero or Guitar God
Read more . . . →Image by ♫axime via Flickr Like many music lovers I learned guitar when I was in high school. I saw my first music video showcasing some really hot licks and I instnatly fell in love; I needed to master those six strings. Unfortunately it's not as simple as getting your hands on the instrument. There is tuning, pracice and guitar lessons that all helped to get me off my feet. I have taken many classes to improve my skill, but this one tiny product helped me imensely. If you want to take your guitar skills to the next level find...
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